Ah ringing church bells

Is like Kaiso gone to nothing. De Kaiso Semi Finals show is synonymous wid “ah big bus” wid ah paltry crowd, dat left CDC scraping de bottom ah de barrel looking foh I-dare. Even Lie-Za was saying dat if CDC and de Sponsors had any interest in de Art Form, dey could ah mek it ah family affair. Leave de Entrance at $15. 00 or even reduce it to $10.00 foh ah family ah four, of which two must be children, and each person gets ah Free Drink.{{more}} But maybe dat sounds like too much of ah Give Away! So dey doubled de Entrance Fee from $15.00 last year, to $ 30.00 dis year. De New Price got nothing to do wid any cultural attract-shun or improvement to de quality ah de Kaisos, it’s an inclusive says de Cheerman: “Come drink as much as you can!” De so called in-cent-teef is about getting Drinks sold, nuttin to do wid Kaiso being de main ah-track-shun, mek it ah drink up Fete, like in de good ole days “Ley we Drink ah rum and tumble down, we don’t K; Kaiso is ah back-anal, we don’t K!” Gross disrespect to de Art Form. De CDC needs to be challenged to come up wid better incentives.

And ah vex wid de PM foh not blocking dat foolish drink-up I-dare, because he voiced his disapproval when he spoke very negatively about dis “Drink as much as yuh can” in Par-liar-mint, he mentioned how he could stop it, but like he didn’t have de Guts ooops, who say de PM ain’t got de Guts! He and Arm-In are walking Gut-ters, but Lie-Za say de PM Guts is to hide and play Ass-Trick and bury its head from de Red-is-straw who Mark up she tek-away salary so high dat she drop from de Red-is-tree.

Man ah vex too, how Kaiso gone to Nutten eh! Gone are de days when Freedom Fighter won de Kaiso Monarch wid ah R.E Gonzales composition, “Hell Ride, and walked away wid de first, brand new second hand Sketch-hell car! Sulle, one ah we great Kaisonian won de second Car. Lie-Za say Sulle doesn’t write Kaisos anymore, he re-tyre. But long gone are de days when yuh couldn’t get ah seat at any ah de Kaiso Tents (especially Preliminaries) held at de Lyric Cinema. Gone too, are de days when dey uses to have Clash ah de Tents wid big Tents like de Classroom, Theatre and Graduates. Not to mention Patches and his Future Stars Tent back den. Gone ah de days when meking it to de Big Yard at Victoria Park was ah Kaisonian’s Dream! When Kaiso Semi Finals uses to be de second biggest CDC show for Vincy Mas, and Kaisonians singing two rounds! Interestingly Junior Kaiso Finals was de biggest CDC Show, wid thousands ah school children from all over attending, when juniors like Papa Das from South Rivers and Man Kemmy from Layou ruled de roost.

Talking bout Junior Kaiso, ah discover on Chose-dey dat yuh can’t sit next to yuh radio in de living room and judge Kaiso. Dat is why ah wondering what de Judges at de Junior Kaiso heard, why de youngster, Brandon Frederick of de Grammar School, wid de best written song, did not even place. Shame on yuh Judges!

Still on Kaiso. Gone too, are de days ah de All Stars Night, de Die-us-poorer Kaiso Party, promoted by Grenville Straker and our Far-reign based Vincy Kaisonians led by de guns, Becket, Soso, Scorcher; accompanied by Vincy greats Frankie, Tony, Rickie and Syl Mac Intosh, Lio Smith et al. Ah remember how locally based Kaisonians were petty and jel-us, and uses to pressure de CDC to block dem from getting ah free night, to host dey own Kaiso Show at Victoria Park. Look how times and things have changed, CDC Judges now have to go to New York to judge de Dynamite Kaiso Tent, to pick candidates to boost Vincy Mas. And from reliable reports, de attendances at de Dynamite Tent is bigger dan any ah de local based tents.

And finally long ago de Kaisonians sang two songs at de Semi Finals, dat second song separated de Goats from de Kiddies, and ensured dat on Finals night, each ah de ten finalists had two good songs. So we will watch, sorry ah will listen de show on Radio, because CDC gave away our rights to see Vincy Mas on TV foh free. CDC will fall deeper in de Red, no pun on ULP Red or Red-is-tree; and de same tax payers who have to pay extra to view it pon pay-per-view, will have to pay again from our hard earned money, to clean up CDC’s mis-managements. Still de Pry-minister got de nerve to tell Par-liar-mint dat “Jack-ass say de world ain’t level!” On Finals night any number could play, de Kaisonian wid de best second song could win. Julian will be dey to “Ring de Bell, Ralph will be dey to “Ring de Bell!” but ah slipping thru de Cat-lick Church gate, wind me way up de steeple and ah go Ring Church Bell! And wid dat is gone ah gone again.

One Love Bassy

Bassy Alexander is a land surveyor, folklorist and social commentator.