Resignosaurs vex: The last of a dying breed

Fri, Oct 7. 2011

Editor: Ever since I saw Jurassic Park in the movies as a young girl, I have been fascinated by dinosaurs. Mainly, I have been curious about what made them extinct. For example: How could a once-mighty predator like Tyrannosaurus rex simply vanish from the face of the earth?{{more}} Theories abound, but the basic answer from scientists is that the world changed, but Tyrannosaurus rex failed to adapt. He just kept doing what he always did, until the world passed him by.

Today, we in SVG are witnessing the extinction of another dinosaur, the Resign-osaurus vex. This rare political dinosaur, sporadically sighted in House of Assembly, is distinguished by its angry and repeated calls for any-and-every body to resign from their jobs, while doggedly clinging to its own job, despite years of personal and professional failure.

In recent years, off the top of my head, the Resign-osaurus vex has called for the resignations of: (1) The Prime Minister (multiple times); (2) the Supervisor of Elections; (3) the Commissioner of Police; (4) the Minister of Tourism; (5) the CEO of the Tourism Authority; (6) the Attorney General (multiple times); (7) the Attorney-General’s husband; (8) various Permanent Secretaries; (9) the heads of various statutory boards; and, most recently, (10) the Minister of Agriculture.

To date, none of these persons have actually resigned, leading me to wonder: Is the call of the Resign-osaurus vex so shrill that ordinary people do not hear it? Like a dog whistle? Or does the repeated bellowing of a lonely Resign-osaurus vex simply fade into the background of any political discourse, indistinguishable from random noise?

Meanwhile, the lonely Resign-osaurus vex persists in its own job, doing what it always does, despite over an unbroken decade of failure. The Resign-osaurus vex may lead a party to defeat in 2001. It may repeat the act in 2005. It may complete the hat trick in 2010. Yet it will not resign. It may become embroiled in a scandal over money for rental of its constituency office, but it will not resign. It may falsely guarantee that it will bring the government down in six months (later revised to one year), but it will stick around. It may be called a senior citizen and be encouraged to step down by its political puppet masters, yet it will remain. It may even promise Vincentians that it would voluntarily resign if it failed to lead its party to victory in the 2010 elections, but it will ignore its own resignation pledge a year later. (Incredible: the Resign-osaurus vex doesn’t even hear itself!)

Assuming elections roll around again in 2015 and Resign-osaurus vex is still around, he would be a 71-year old dinosaur, having been at the helm of a major political party for a record 15-year stretch of uninterrupted futility.

Extinction is clearly not far behind.

In the coming months and years, as the Resign-osaurus vex enters its political death throes, we can expect increasingly indiscriminate calls for the resignations of all and sundry. We can also expect that Resign-osaurus vex will never turn its critical eye upon itself, or hear its own overused prescription for all manner of political ailments. Physician, heal thyself!

Maybe the Resign-osaurus vex is the distant relative of the Dodo, a large, flightless, pointy-headed bird whose own lack of common sense and failure to adapt led to its extinction in the 17th century.

In any event, let us appreciate the last Resign-osaurus vex while it still exists. We in SVG are unlikely ever to experience such consistent failure, such sustained inability to galvanize the public on any issue, or such comic ineptitude again in our lifetimes. I for one will miss the repeated bleats of “Resign!” from the Resign-osaurus vex as it fades into the political ether, a subject of study, scorn and bafflement for future generations.

Safia

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