I was his princess once upon a time

Hey Rosie ,
                 
I am deadly in love with this man and he use to treat me like a PRINCESS. When we just met he would say things then he will just do it just for me and he will, but I was already in love with him from the very day I saw him. At the time he was still going to school and I would do things for him to show him that there is only one of me who could love and he knows there is no one else out there will love him like the way I could ‘cause there is only one kind me.

When my parents found out that we were together they did everything they knew in the book just to break us up, nothing didn’t work, nothing just did not work. I got pregnant for him and I had a miscarriage and after the miscarriage and we were so ummm- words just can’t explain. Most of my family members told me that if I love my family I would leave him alone and you know, just because I did not they turned their back me . I told him any time he leave me for anybody else I will personally kill him my self because I really do love you . And all of this happen last year.

And then I started to hear his name calling with other girls from his area and other places. When I ask them he would say it is not true but I just taking. It’s hard to beleive him because he had lied to me before . Rosie I just fed til I turn off my cell phone and I am not seeing him and all of that is good ‘cause I don’t want to see him either . If I ask him to come and look for me he can’t ‘cause he have things to do. He ain’t have not one thing to do, he don’t have any child to mind or he ain’t have no house of his own to say he has to work and pay the bills. I’m in need of advice.
 
 CJH
 
Dear CJH,

 You have had a very traumatic year with many, many upheavals.  Sometimes we hear our family or older folks say, “out of evil cometh good”.  You my dear had one of these experiences.

 Let me go through them with you; you met a guy you fell “deadly in love with” – that’s never a good thing!  You can not become so wrapped up with the feelings of love that it overtakes your very being.  Then you are no longer your own person.

 Then you would do anything to prove that you were the only woman for him (by the way were you also in school or are you older than this young man?). 

Again, why are you doing this?  When you meet someone, yes it’s great, but we don’t start doing everything for the person.  They will come to expect it and sometimes take it and you for granted. 

Your parents then found out and weren’t happy (ok so I answered my own question you are still as young as him).  Maybe they were seeing what you were putting yourself through in order to impress your boyfriend, and they were not pleased.  One thing though for parents…the harder you push, the more they run to the fire.  Always try another approach.

Then you said that you would kill yourself!  That gets me crazy!  Why would you say that?  Even think it?  Do you know who you are?  Someone special.  A person who can never be duplicated.  Hear me clearly.  Thinking about suicide is NEVER the answer!  This situation as painful as it has been, and yes I do know about the miscarriage along with your family being mad with you.  All these things must never bring you to the point of taking your life.  NEVER.  Love you my girl.  Don’t leave it in the hands of another.

 Finally your “prince” is cheating and ignoring you.  It isn’t right, but this tends to happen when you are this young and immature.  So I come back to the old adage, “out of evil cometh good” or “what doesn’t kill you will only make you stronger”.  Take all of these experiences; look back at how lucky you are to be here.  That you are bright, I am sure good looking, should continue your education and most of all help other girls around you who may be going through the same thing.  You see you are much wiser than a year ago, so get up, dust yourself off and realize that you survived all this hurt. You are much wiser and smarter for it.  Keep moving forward and believing in YOU.
 
Rosie

Send questions to Rosie at: heyrosie24@yahoo.com or PO Box 152, Kingstown,St Vincent & the Grenadines