Trying to keep up appearance

Hey Rosie,

I am living a lie. Everyone thinks that I have it together, but I really don’t!  I am struggling to pay my bills even though it looks like I have everything going on.  Also, I am having a rough patch with my husband.  He has been drinking more, hanging out with his “buddies“ and we fight over money a lot.  Rosie, it’s stressing me out so much and I am trying to keep up appearances, even in front of the in-laws and my family.  My hair is falling out and I can’t sleep. How much more can I take? I truly don’t know.  I feel as though I’m being swallowed alive.

Help me!

Dear Help me!

My heart goes out to you. You are going through a huge juggling act, but you truly have the power within you to manage a lot of this chaos.

I agree that you don’t have to tell everyone all of your business about your finances and personal life, but sometimes we need a couple of good allies in our corner. You need to have a better support system, one that you can trust and sometimes rely on for honest and straight-forward feedback.

So you are going to need a few things: 1. You are going to have to learn to take a lot of these pre-conceived stress off of your shoulders.  No one is perfect, no one! Take some deep breaths and give yourself a break, please. 2. Work out a budget and a serious plan to curb your spending and another plan to help pay down your debts. 3. You and your husband are going to have to take some serious steps regarding his recent behaviour and spending habits. Seek professional help if it is too much for you to handle.  4. Finally, find some cheap and easy ways to destress yourself.  Go for a walk, take up a hobby such as gardening or maybe painting.  You have to put your well-being at the forefront.

Deep breaths, my friend, you can turn this around. Just remember you don’t have to put all of this pressure on yourself.

Rosie

Send questions to Rosie at: heyrosie24@yahoo.com or PO Box 152, Kingstown,St Vincent & the Grenadines