My loved ones do not respect my boundaries

Hey Rosie,

I HAVE FAMILY members who just drop by without letting me know. I find it very disrespectful. They have no idea if I have company, if I am not in the mood, broke or otherwise! The kicker is that they expect to be fed and catered to. Not because I am single should they take advantage of my kindness like this. The main offenders are my mother’s sisters who come over to gossip and drink, some cousins with their friends and a neighbour. I really need this revolving door to quit!

Just Tired

Hello, Just Tired,

I totally get it. How frustrating is that? You will have to put your foot down if you intend to see any real changes with their invasive behaviour.

If they drop by you can say: 1. “It’s not a good time, because you have plans”. 2. You can not answer the door or phone (I know it’s a bit passive aggressive or childish), but some people get the message. Or 3. Sit them down individually and explain that you love, appreciate and often enjoy their company, but you truly do not appreciate their unannounced visits. They will have a lot to say or maybe even get offended, but stand firm in your stance. THEY will eventually get it and adhere to the rules of YOUR hospitality.

This is happening because they feel you are the young single one who they can push over. This is an opportunity to redefi ne YOUR boundaries, all while loving your family at the same time.

Be strong, my girl, you got this!

Rosie

● Send questions to Rosie at: heyrosie24@yahoo.com or PO Box 152, Kingstown, St Vincent & the Grenadines