My mother kicked me out, now I want to go home

Hey Rosie,

My mother put me out because she said I was disrespectful and lazy. I have to admit that she is right. I don’t want to admit it to her, but she is. You see I have a pretty decent job for a 26-year-old. I have a two-year-old truck and I hang out hard with my friends, even going on vacation a few times a year.  But I didn’t think I needed to give my mom money towards the household; she makes good money and always held it down.  All of a sudden, after my new job, she started demanding that I contribute to the home and help out more. So, I pushed back and did nothing. Now I’m out and finding it hard to afford a place to live. I have been couch surfing for the last three months and I know my friend is tired and I have to pay HER for the couch!  Rosie, I want to make up and go home, but my pride is in the way. 

Want to go home

Dear Want to go home,

Ahh boy, so you are one of those people who doesn’t miss the water until the well runs dry, huh? This is what you call a crossroads and you have some major decisions to make.

At 26, you CAN make it on your own; you may have to do some “tweaking” of your very fabulous lifestyle and find a small apartment within your budget.  Believe me, this is very doable; it may not be as comfortable as your home, but at least you would be independent and making your own decisions.

Then, you might be saying that you would like the opportunity to move home, mend the fences with your mother, save some money and above it all do the right thing and contribute to the household. To have the boldness to say that she makes “good money” is shameful on your part, after it would very much appear that your mother has done a wonderful job by giving you a great base to grow from. So, if this is the route you would like to travel, go with your hat in your hand (humble yourself), apologize to your mom and work out some new and reasonable terms regarding your contributions to the household. 

Either way, this is one of those life lessons we all must go through. I am happy that you were honest about your role in this particular misstep.  Always respect your parents; they are the ones we can mostly depend on.  Good luck! 

Rosie

Send questions to Rosie at: heyrosie24@yahoo.com or PO Box 152, Kingstown,St Vincent & the Grenadines