My jealous bf hits me!

Hey Rosie,

I am in High School and I am 15. I have a boyfriend who is in another high school and he is 17. We love one another, Rosie, and we share everything together; he knows everything about me and I know everything about him. I even know the pass code to his phone, because there are no secrets. He doesn’t even hide when other girls send him sexy pictures of themselves, because he doesn’t send any back to them. The only thing is that he is very jealous.{{more}} If he calls me and I don’t pick up in time, he gets angry and would yell at me and accuse me of doing something wrong. He has even hit me three different times and he was so sorry afterward that he apologized and said that he would never do it again. I believe him, because that was weeks ago and he has not touched me. The problem is that my older sister, who is 18, saw when he hit me the second time and said she is going to tell our mother. I begged her not to and she said if she knows that he did it again she will tell. She says that he will always hit me and I should leave. Do you think she is right? I really love him and I don’t want to leave him.

Help Me

Dear Help Me,

Oh boy, if you normally read my advice, you would already know what I am going to say, right? You are 15 and you are in a deep, complicated and yes, abusive relationship. This is not good my friend; I know this is NOT what you want to hear, but it’s the truth.

Why are you and your boyfriend acting as though you are married? You are teenagers, who should be out in groups of friends, hanging out, having safe fun, getting to know about each other’s personalities and life in general. Meanwhile, you are there connected to the phone, can’t miss a call, being hit occasionally (one time is too many), talking about sexy photos etc. All these movements are for grown folks and even then it’s still not a healthy relationship. Remember love should NEVER hurt and you should never be hit – let’s make that very clear. So, that is a big strike one against your boo.

I wholeheartedly agree with your big sister and I would have already told on you (it’s for your protection more than snitching). Why are you making excuses for him like this? I would take a step back; look at how this relationship is unfolding and how it makes you feel. You may come to realize that it’s not all candy and sunshine, as you think. In fact, you may just be so accustomed to being with him that you are afraid of being alone. I would strongly suggest going to speak to maybe a school counsellor or someone whom you trust and who can give you sound advice. In my opinion, I would not stay in this relationship; you have too much ahead of you in terms of your education and positive experiences in general to be caught up in this drama.

Rosie