Is this an obsession?

Hey Rosie,

I am madly in love with this guy I met three years ago. Everything was going so great, until I started hearing things about him, and I even found out some stuff about him, so I let him go, because I was too hurt and I couldn’t deal with it.{{more}}

I tried getting over him and I even tried hating him, but I love him so much, that memories just kept playing with my head.

Eventually we started talking to each other again, but we’re just friends; and then, just when I thought I had moved on, my feelings are back again. I can’t help it, Rosie, because I love him soooo much and I don’t even know if he realizes how much I do, because he never opened up to me about how he really feels.

Every time I see him, I get jolly and I can’t stop smiling. I love being around him, I love his personality and I even fell in love with one of his favourite rappers, L’il Wayne.

Rosie, am I fooling myself believing that maybe one day he’ll open up to me about how he really feels about me? Is this an obsession, or am I just crazy in love?

Dear Love,

You are not obsessed, you are in love. That’s the one thing you can’t fight in this life — it’s who you fall in love with — even if they are not always good for you.

You seem to be a very intelligent young lady and a thinker. There must be something about this young man that makes you unsure of his feelings for you.

The fact that you already found out things about him and he doesn’t share his feelings easily, along with the fact that you were so hurt by him in the past, should cause you some pause. Why would you let someone like this take over your emotions? I understand your being attracted to him and wanting to make this work, but there comes a time when your happiness and mental health supersede how you feel about someone else.

Step back and ask yourself if this experience is enhancing your life or causing it pain? Then decide what is more important. It will fall into place. You are an intelligent young woman.

Peace,

Rosie