Should I return home to be with my boyfriend?

Hey Rosie,

I am young and in love, but who isn’t, right? Anyway, I have been with my boyfriend for about three years now. We started dating each other at a young age. At first, I wasn’t really into him, but a few months after, when I got to know him, I liked what I saw. Since then, we have been unbreakable. He is my first real boyfriend — first kiss and first sexual partner.{{more}} About a year ago, my mom sent for me and it was hard on us. We really love each other. He tells his friends and family that he really loves me, and I am his wife and no one can replace me. He misses me like crazy and he is waiting until I come back to marry me. It sounds like I got a keeper, right? Plus, it is like I am already a part of his family. My family doesn’t like him at all. None of them really know him, just the rumours they heard. We fought to get to where we are today and neither of us is ready to let it go. I want to go back home and see him and see where our relationship goes. So, my question is should I keep hope alive or let go or let destiny take its course? I will take any advice you can give me.

Young and In Love

Hello Young and In Love

The only thing that I missed here were your ages, but I think I’m getting that you are both young adults.

I have to tell you the adage about absence making the heart grow fonder may be very true here and may also mask some of the true realities around both of you.

He being your first everything is a very big deal. In some cases, it was a lot very quickly. He has a special place in your heart; but it is time to think about where you are now and where you are heading. You guys are going to have the “real talk” conversation.

You may not want to hear this, but sometimes life intervenes for a reason. Forget the issues with your family, rumours etc. This is about seizing the opportunities in front of you. You are in a place where you can go to school, see the world, make new friends and, in some cases, more diverse friends and have a career.

I’m not saying that you should totally give up on this relationship, but you both may need the space to grow and mature. Who knows in a few short years, you both may have very different outlooks, but it doesn’t mean losing a friendship.

So, my advice is stay there and give your future a chance. If it is meant to be, then it will be naturally. Good luck to the both of you.

Rosie