My father keeps borrowing my money and never pays back
Hey Rosie,
My problem is that I keep lending money to my father and he never pays me back. Rosie, this man is always coming to my job to beg for money. He left my mother when we were children, he drinks a lot and he has never supported us. But for some reason, I always fall for his hard luck story about his being broke. Rosie, he has another family, so why do I keep falling for this manâs story? Heâs not even trying to be in my childrenâs lives, my siblings or mine otherwise. {{more}}My brothers donât even speak to him; help me Rosie!
Upset
Dear Upset,
Isnât that something? The person who turned their back on you is the one who comes a calling for help â and often too? This is like a test that the Lord would send; how do you address the person who has wronged you? Do you forgive them completely? Do you forgive them, help them, but remind them? Or do you ignore them?
Well, my dear, you have done well, you have helped him and it seems that you havenât thrown it back in his face. Now that, to me, is the sign of a very big person. Now, I am going to ask you this: have YOU had enough? You have been a great daughter and a wonderful human being, but there comes a time when one has to say, “Enough!â I think this is your time.
He is using you and this is unacceptable. He has a few flaws, it would seem: he has a drinking problem, he abandoned his family when they were in need, he doesnât have a relationship with his grandchildrenâ¦just to mention a few â based on what you told me, so in my opinion he has some serious mending of fences to do.
He will more than likely not change at this point, but you shouldnât be his enabler either. So, the next time he comes a calling you are going to have to use the gift of “noâ. “Sorry I canât help youâ. You also do not need an explanation; you donât have explain your actions to someone like this, even if he is your father.
This lesson goes to show that a user can come in many shapes, sizes and relations. Do not be upset, continue to rise and succeed. Be blessed.
Rosie
Send questions to Rosie at: heyrosie24@yahoo.com or
P.O Box 152, Kingstown, St. Vincent & the Grenadines.
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