My boyfriend cheated on me, his mom does not like me

Hey Rosie,

I currently live with my boyfriend, his parents and our one-year-old son and it’s hell. You see, my boyfriend cheated several times while I was pregnant, with two of his exes. He admitted and said he was sorry and he is going to change for our son and that he loves me. I can see his efforts and I thought all was well until I saw naked pictures of one of his exes, who is married, on his Blackberry.{{more}} The other one, he talks to constantly, because (his exact words) “She is away studying and is lonely and I just talk to her because she has nobody else”. But the nature of the conversation is xxx. My next problem is his mother, who constantly compares me to the one that is married. She makes me feel like I am not good enough for her son. She even questioned my child’s paternity. I am feeling so depressed and torn and heartbroken. I just want to cry all the time.

Bruised n Broken

Dear Bruised n Broken,

Ok, so let’s dry those tears, because they are clouding your vision of what you need to do and, believe me, there is some work to do.

My first advice to you is to STOP being a victim! I realize that you are a young mother with a young son, but if this is causing you all this pain and insecurity, then it’s time you say “Enough is enough!”

Why would you want to feel and be treated like a second class citizen? I am here to tell you that your boyfriend is going to keep these games up, because he knows that you aren’t going to leave. You can show him differently, but you will have to decide that you are worth much more than this shabby treatment.

Listen, do not put up with your man talking to a “lonely ex” who is away and he is “her comforter”; no ma’am, do not! Then, to add insult to injury, he is phone sexting with his other woman, who happens to be married, and this foolish woman is sending naked pictures of herself to him? Ha! She’s really foolish in this day and age to be playing this game; guaranteed this will come back to blow up in her face shortly. Finally, you are living with his family and his mother obviously doesn’t like you … the bottom line is why are you doing this to yourself?

You need a plan; the first is to find good and safe childcare for your son during the day, then you need to find a JOB, after which you save your pay cheque and find a place, then MOVE OUT! My friend, there comes a time when you have to take a deep breath and move forward in faith. This relationship is not the healthiest at this point. If you want to work on this relationship (your choice), it should be done from a distance and to your benefit. Your boyfriend should still be encouraged to be in his son’s life, but he shouldn’t be allowed to put yours through the dryer!

Please dig deep and do the right thing for you, because you deserve so much better.

Rosie

Send questions to Rosie at: heyrosie24@yahoo.com or P.O Box 152, Kingstown, St. Vincent & the Grenadines.