Pull-it-to-kill master strokes

Time seems to be running out foh our Prime Minister Gone-soft. Elections are due in 2015 and his work is unfinished. Firstly he will love to finish de Airport by den, de question is, “can he?”

Crime is ah serious issue, and Agricultural Farmers crying out, Banana production is at an all time low. Workers are being laid of at business houses, dey’s ah serious jobless situation now stalking de land.{{more}} Seems like de PM has to resort to “Pull-it-to-kill Master Strokes!” His call foh Reparation is ah Master Strokes, dat seems like a drawn out project and by 2015 is not likely to bear any material fruits dat people are led to expect. De call foh research on de use of ‘Me-dissing-all Marie-won-her’ is also ah good Master Stroke, dis is also ah far-fetched proposal and ‘Marie-won-he Farmers’ expecting de green light like yesterday. Dat too might back-fire! By de way Lie-Za is asking me to get her some ah de Me-dissing-all Marie-won-her seeds, not de illegal smoking ones. She is my cross!

But de PM’s greatest dilemma is his “succession theory”, de establishment of his Die-hasty!

Making his son Camilo ah senator and Minister ah Far-rain Ah-Fear’s is ah Pull-it-to-kill Master Stroke. Camillo is bright and able, but dey are other implications though. Ralph fancies himself as ah King David and his son de Solomon who will be heir to de throne of King David. Time is running out and de ole King David is beginning to have nightmares dat are close to reality. Every night he lie down to sleep is like he seeing Saboto wearing ah Crown, he seeing Jomo wearing ah Crown, he seeing Luke Browne wearing ah Crown but in all ah dis he ain’t seeing Camillo. Saboto is likely to hold his own in his constituency and before de advent ah Camillo, he was considered ah likely successor to Ralph…Dah’s If!

Everytime ah mention de name Luke Browne to Lie-Za she say de Billing and Loan Ghost may very well haunt him and his pen. Jomo, she says, miscalculated, he drop de bone foh de shadow. Jomo is not aware of de high regards and great respect readers have foh him. Dey read his “Plain Talk” like Gospel. Dey like how he is never afraid to oppose Gone-soft and Arm-in and readers on both sides were beginning to see Jomo as de next Joshua. Now if people could see leadership qualities in Jomo, bet yuh last dollar dat Ralph done see dat long time ago, and Jomo is seen as ah threat to Camillo’s ascendancy. So Jomo is made ULP senator at 55 years ole, Jomo doesn’t have ah chance right now to win ah seat in any NDP constituency. Camillo will be placed in ah ULP sure seat, he’ll win and will tek up Solomon’s seat and wait, “Who he hut he hut!”

RALPH WALKS OUT AH PAR-LIAR-MINT

Still on de Master Stroke, de Dr Fry-dey bluff from Ralph. If is one seat de NDP is not likely to lose right now is de Northern Grenadines, held by Dr Fry-dey. And Ralph’s I-dare to offer de Deputy Speaker’s position to Fry-dey is ah Pull-it-tek-all Master Stroke. It will mek Ralph look like he handing de olive branch to de Awe-position, also some NDP supporters will be watching Fry-dey wid suspicion But Arm-in knows Ralph tricks, from de time he heard dat Ralph trying desperately to reach him, he knew another Master Stroke coming. Lie-Za said Eustace should ah offered ah counter proposal and suggested Leacock or Cummings, preferably Cummings be given de position of Deputy Speaker. She pictures ah scene in de House when Deputy Speaker Cummings is invited to sit in de Speaker’s “Chair”. Immediately Cummings will ask that someone move that his special Chair be made available for him, and Leacock will jump to his feet and say: “Mr Speaker I so move!” At dis moment de PM will begin to rise and Senator Frederick will beat him to it and say: “Mr Speaker I beg to second de motion!” Confusion in de House! Julian laughing his belly full, he knows dat de Guv-ah-mint side has de majority so dat motion can’t pass, he den invites de Speaker to call foh ah vote. “Those not in fear-fah say Nay” says de Speaker. Ah loud Nay comes from de twelve members on de Guv-ah-mint side. Den Cummings turns his head to de Awe-position and says “Those in fear-fah, say I.” As is expected ah weak “I” comes from de nine members on de Awe-position side. Well Pandemonium breaks lose when de Deputy Speaker, Cummings stands up and says: “De I’s have it, de I’s have it!” Man de Prime Minister packs up his eleven copy books, and foh de first time in de his-story ah de Par-liar-mint of St. Vincent and the Grenadines, Ralph and his followers in de Guv-ah-mint walks out ah Par-liar-mint in protest! And wid dat, is gone ah gone again!

One Love Bassy

Bassy Alexander is a land surveyor, folklorist and social commentator.