March 26, 2010
How to give your cat a pill

1. Wrap the pill in a bite of special food or in a treat. Cream cheese seems to be especially effective. Then let your cat eat the food in any way that works best. For some cats, this means putting the treat (and the pill) in the food dish. In other cases, it is better to have your cat eat it away from the normal food dish or from your finger.{{more}}

2. If your cat cannot eat the pill or will not eat solid food, you might have to crush the pill. If it is a capsule, then you’ll simply pop it. Mix the powder or gel with a treat. In some cases, this can be done all at once. In other cases, you’ll have to spread the doses over a couple of treats. It depends on what your cat needs to ingest.

3. If you mix the pill with cream cheese or some other spreadable cat treat, you can put it on your cat’s paw. You’ll see that almost instantly, your cat will lick up the treat and the crushed pill.

4. If you have a kitten, simply train your kitten to accept pills thrown into their throats. Kittens generally aren’t strong enough to prevent you from doing this. If you do this from when they are young from time to time, they will learn to swallow the pill. No mess, on fuss.

The following is what happens when you do not know how to give a pill to your cat.

1. Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on each side of the cat’s mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth, pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

2. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat gently in left arm and repeat process.

3. Retrieve cat from bedroom, pick up and throw away soggy pill.

4. Take new pill from packet, cradle cat in left arm, holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for count of ten.

5. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse in from garden.

6. Kneel on the floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into cat’s mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub throat vigorously.

7. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill out of packet. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep up shattered figurines and vases from floor and set on side for gluing later.

8. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow into drinking straw.

9. Check label to make sure pill in not harmful to humans, drink glass of water to take the taste away. Apply band aid to spouse’s forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

10. Retrieve cat from neighbour’s shed. Get another pill. Place cat in cupboard and close door just enough so that head is showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with plastic band.

11. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for last tetanus shot. Throw tee-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

12. Do not try to retrieve cat from tree across road.

For further information, contact: Dr. Collin Boyle
Unique Animal Care Co. Ltd.
Tele: 456 4981