An open letter to mediocre men

The idea that a woman’s worth is inextricably tied to her ability to keep a man and raise children still persists in modern society.

I understand that many of our customs and beliefs are grounded in religion and patriarchy, but come on, it’s 2017. Alas, getting married and having children are still seen as the biggest achievements any woman can have, and this idea is still reinforced by men and women.

Biologically, women have a greater responsibility to produce children than men do. I don’t challenge that. However, we must stop this harassment of women who either cannot, or choose not to have children. A woman without a child is no less of a woman; it seems crazy that these statements must be made, but they do.

“My children are the highlight of my life” – good for you, Susan. Nothing is wrong with your children being the highlight of your life; it’s your life. However, we must learn to accept that women can be equally as fulfilled without children or a husband.

Why is a woman’s worth based on how much pain she can bear? We’ve built a society fabricated on the belief that a woman’s true calling is to carry burdens. One does not simply get married; one must keep a husband. Are men animals? Will they run away if left unsupervised? Everything surrounding us is geared towards the idea that men must be maintained, and any slacking will result in loneliness. Apparently, being with a bad man is better than being single.

This idea of “building up a man” that men reinforce, that women must tolerate all of men’s shenanigans while they mature into proper adults is ridiculous. Women must turn a blind eye to cheating and allow it to “get out of their system”. Or my favourite, women must be patient while a man develops ambition, and learns to maintain a suitable standard of living. Build your damn self; I have things to do!

Women are expected to nurture and support men, until they become full adults. What about the women? Who’s supporting them? Your silly excuse of “financial support” is weak at best; news flash – women earn their own money now. Over the past seven decades, women have made leaps and bounds in economic maturity and parenting, and the men? I’ll let you answer that one for yourself.

This is not a piece geared towards hating men, or castrating them. It is simply an open letter telling them to DO BETTER. This isn’t 1963; women make their own money now. You’re required to offer more than just money and sperm; sorry to burst your bubble.

Women are expected to work eight hours a day, cook, clean, maintain their looks, take care of the children… the list goes on and on. I am sick and tired of seeing men being rewarded for the most basic household contributions that women have been doing for a millennial. A man picks up his child from pre-school and swears he should be applauded. Did you watch the children on Saturday while your wife ran errands? Guess what, there is no such thing as “babysitting” your child; it’s called parenting.

There are still lots of women who expect to be completely reliant on a man for financial support, I know they still exist in numbers. However, increasingly more and more women are being educated and outearning men. As a matter of fact, more women are being educated than men, meaning that in the next few decades, there will be more women than men in leadership positions. Women have evolved, and unless you want to be left behind, men, you should too.