I have a sister that I donât get along with. No matter what happens, we fight all day. This has been going on for years and now that we are in our 20s, itâs only getting worse. We both finished school. I moved out (partly because of her) and have my own place and I am happy. She still lives at home with our parents. My mother is sad because we canât get along, I told her I would try, but as soon as I did, my sister insulted me in public about my apartment and also about my friends and I was done! Can I write off my sister? I am so done with her and her nasty ways.{{more}}
Fed Up
Dear Fed Up,
You are not the only sibling who has had this issue and you will not be the last either. The only thing that sticks out in my mind is that you guys are in your twenties and you still have this level of animosity? Something will have to be done, because you will only have each other as you get older and you should try to have at least a civil relationship.
Your sister could be a little jealous at this stage because you have moved on and are becoming independent, while she remains at home with your parents. I am sure many people might bring that up to her and it must get her upset to be compared to you this often. So, because of this she becomes defensive and prickly, because she thinks you may feel the same way.
My suggestion is that you keep your interactions brief and respectful. Keep in mind that your parents are suffering through this drama as well and it must be very painful to witness. As time goes by, you both may come to realize there is no need to bicker this often and find mutual/neutral things to have in common. If worst comes to worst, you can both have a mediator help you hash out your issues, so you can start on a clean page. But at the end of the day, you canât write family off; they are with us for a lifetime.
Rosie
Send questions to Rosie at: heyrosie24@yahoo.com
or PO Box 152, Kingstown, St Vincent & the Grenadines
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