February 14, 2014
Wretch-de-brute-shun coming

Lie-Za drew my attention to Utter Some’s High Court.victory Case against de Go-venom-men’t. An incident took place in 2010 when Utter Some was de Head-teacher of de South Rivers Met-dis Primary School.{{more}}

He was of course once ah stalwart supporter of de ULP but had drawn swords wid de PM. One day in 2010, de Prime Minister visited de school, completely blanked Utter Some, conducted his mission and left widout reporting or saying ah word to de official head-teacher. Utter Some took issue wid de PM and challenged him foh disregarding Ministry of Education protocol.

Nobody does dat to Ralph and get away. His PSC transferred Utter Some as head-teacher and dumped him at NEMO. But Justice Gertel Thom had de final say, she ruled dat de transfer was irrational and illegal. De records will show dat Ralph had nothing to do wid dat, he too smart wid his signature. He got his clone-knees wid mop and scrubbing brush planted in every Go-venom-men’t department. But before Utter Some took Go-venom-men’t to Courts, he cleaned up his act, got baptized and had himself Anointed. De brothers and sisters all went pon dey knees and “ hastened to de place, where God our Savior shows his face; and gladly took up residence there, and wait pon Him, sweet hour of prayer!” One by one, we will see de demise of all who connive to destroy Utter Some, Elvis, Bash, Johnson, Bowman our innocent citizens.

Justice Thom gave Utter Some three months to submit his claim foh damages; but once it got to go to Papa, he might as well forget it. “Nah bother wid dat” Lie-Za said. “ De PM is wondering if is Owe-beeah or his final “R” as in pull-it-tek-all Retch-de-brute-shun catching up wid him. He had instant die-ah-rear when he saw Frank Da Silva appearing from nowhere and waltz into his convention. He gave Frank de Beer hug foh all to see, but he’s in suspense, Frank is bluntly critical and usually not beneficial to de party he links up wid.

So now Ralph got Frank to deal wid, he got Utter Some Case to settle and den de scandal in New York way de diplomat was “involved in activities … inimical to the interest of the people of St. Vincent and the Grenadines.” Didn’t de Adventist had same-law charges against Ah-cursed-us? Dey’s more dan de Pistle in de Mortar


Early Monday morning, my near-bah dogs broke de fence and come on my side and put some bites in me Ass! Now before people meet me and start asking me to show dem way ah get bite, de Ass is me wife’s donkey dah name Lizzy. She bought it to replace de weed-eater. We had difficulty getting ah Vet to come. Ah finally got Dr Glasgow to intercede. Was not until after lunch dat de ministry jeep pulled up at me gate, ah lickle lady looking about 14 years ole came out and asked me “where is your donkey?” She sensed ah didn’t know her, so she said “I am Dr Toney.” Very petite, when she stood near de Ass, dey were neck and neck in height, but she was full ah con-fee-dense. She took one look at Lizzy, gave ah painful frown, took out he Cell and called de office for some assistance. Another vehicle pulled up wid two more girl-size ladies, one even shorter dan Dr Toney, lickle girl eh, she was Dr Davis, another Vet; and den de big bad Jean in de bunch introduced herself as Dr Dick yet another Vet. Dem three lickle women, put on dey gloves and went to wuk stitching up and dressing Lizzy’s wounds which were quite deep. In de midst ah de operation, Lizzy let go ah fresh load ah smelly too-too, stink! yuh think dat bother dem? never!

These ladies are special, dey are nation builders, responsible fok keeping animal farmers and my Ass alive in SVG. Doctors Tony and Davis were trained in Cuba, Dick in Guyana. Thank you Fidel! Thank you Forbes and Cheddi! Ah want to suggest to de CDC when next dey picking pretty face girls, wid no talent to vie foh Miss SVG title and scholarship, dey must first check de Vets Division at de Agric Dept foh contestant No’s 1, 2 and 3. My three picks foh Miss SVG.

Based on ah rate of $100. 00 an hour per Vet, multiply by three ah dem and figured dat my bill will be at least $300. 00. So nervously ah asked dem what is de bill, and like dey had rehearsed de chorus lines, in unison dey sang out “ dey’s no cost! It’s a free service, courtesy de Ministry, and you must write about dat in your column dis week.” I highly commend de Ministry. So finally, Dr Davis, who obviously reads my column, told me when ah big-up de ministry, put it just before de end way ah does always say “And wid dat is gone ah gone again!”

One Love Bassy

Bassy Alexander is a land surveyor, folklorist and social commentator.