“If I live I live and if I die I die.”

As her life hung in the balance at the Milton Cato Memorial last Wednesday, having drunk the poisonous weedicide gramoxone the day before, 31-year-old Rosanette Thomas was the epitome of depression; repentant to some extent but still possessing no real desire to live.

Speaking to SEARCHLIGHT, Rosanette said that she could not explain what has happened to her over the last few years.{{more}}

“I use to go to church, dedicated my life to God, I use to love to pray and I don’t know what happened to me,” said Rosanette.

The mother of two including a 13-year-old girl said that she believes that she is demon possessed; saying that her life is being tormented by the devil.

“Something keeps telling me to just kill myself,” said the Mount Grenan resident who beyond all realistic comprehension convinced a friend to give her an eight ounce soft drink bottle with the dangerous substance, around 10:30 a.m. last Tuesday.

“He tried to pull it from me when he see I going to drink it but I did done drink some,” she said of the friend.

Rosanette, who would be 32 in September, if against all odds she survives the damage she has inflicted on her self, said that she used to tell her pastor about her depression and the voices that were prompting her endlessly to end her life.

She said that she visited a psychiatrist about a month ago because of the voices in her head and was being treated for depression.

As she lay in her bed at the Milton Cato Memorial Hospital, Rosanette constantly winced in pain, complaining of a sharp cutting in her stomach; as the poison ate away at her system.

Her daughter visited her while she was speaking to us.

Looking up at her daughter, who seemed lost for words, the confusion, shame, fear and depression mixed on the canvas of her beautiful, black face – an unpleasant sight, if ever there was one.

At press time she was still fighting for her life.