October 8, 2004

Bajan wants Vincy pals

Dear Pastor Jackson,

A blessed day to you; hoping everything is okay. Well, I’m always reading your column in the SEARCHLIGHT newspaper every week and I notice that you give good advice.

This is a bit different from other letters – the reason for this letter is to ask you if you can help me make friends through your column. {{more}}My name is Josselle Thorne and I’m living in Barbados. I’m 24 years old and would like to make friends with people ages 25 to 30 years from SVG. Anyone interested, the address is Clapham Ridge, Coral Cliff, St. Michael, Barbados. I’m also a Christian and love the Lord very much. Thanking you in advance. God bless.


Hello to you Josselle,

Before addressing your letter I want to just drop a few words of love and appreciation to my dear wife. On September 24th she gave birth to our second daughter. As I did with our first born, I watched the entire process; couldn’t help but say WOW! As I watched her go through labour, even though I know it is a natural process that her body could handle, I couldn’t help but salute her. I dare say as a man … you can’t watch your wife give birth and not be amazed by her strength. So “Rons”, I salute you. Thank you for our precious daughter … You have added to my joy.

Now Josselle, thank you for the compliment and it is good to know that you are a faithful reader of the SEARCHLIGHT and by extension, this column. So, if this column could help you make some good Vincy friends, so be it. I must admit, though, I am usually a bit cautious with the foreign pen-pal scene. I find that many people use it disguised as seeking friendship when in fact they are looking for spouses. Some may say nothing is wrong with that and they might be right, but I have reason for concern.

A long-distance relationship(e-mail, letters and phone calls) often removes the personal interaction that I find is so vital in people getting to know each other. Many mask their true self behind well-constructed, thought-out words. It is one thing to take your time and respond to a letter or an e-mail as you watch a picture on your wall, but it is a whole different drama when you see someone, day in, day out; catch them in a bad mood; see their revealed faults. It is not the same at all. So it is often a disaster if someone rushes into something permanent stemming from this, only to realize that the person they wrote and e-mailed is miles different from the real deal. So, make friends, have pen pals, but be careful of the fairy tale expectations that often pop up these days. Continue in the Lord, my friend.

Pastor Jackson