Hey Rosie!
January 16, 2009
Should I fight for her?

Hey Rosie,

I am a guy living in Canada. I am so in love with this girl, but I don’t know if she loves me. She says she does, but sometimes she shows a different face. Sometimes, things would be good, then other times bad. She blames me for everything, even if its not my fault. I try talking to her but sometimes she doesn’t want to talk. When I try to talk, she says I am stressing her.{{more}}M:[more]##

This girl and her son mean so much to me. She has helped me through some bad times in my life. I just want to be there for her now, but don’t know what to do. Sometimes I think she might have feelings for someone else, but she would say she is not that kind of girl. What should I do Rosie? Should I stay and fight for her, because I really love her? Or should I go?

Please help me

Dear Please Help Me,

You seem to be a very decent guy and I say this because not only do you love this young woman, but you are also a very loyal friend because she was there for you during a very difficult period in your life. So you would like to be there for her now. These are great qualities in a good friend.

I say good friend because even though you love this young lady very much and she says she loves you, she may be going through some very personal and difficult things at the moment that you cannot help her with. You see, sometimes we want to be a person’s saviour, but they have to save themselves first. That is why every time you try to talk to her about the nature of your relationship, she may snap at you and say that you are stressing her out.

Be her friend, give her some space. My thing is, this relationship will not work at the moment because she is not ready. I have no doubt that she has very deep feelings for you and may love you in her own way. But she isn’t at the place yet to commit herself fully to you emotionally.

I know this is not what you may want to hear at the moment, but I know you do not want to lose the relationship of this young lady’s friendship. You should also find other activities to occupy yourself with such as anything positive that you may have always wanted to try. Place those energies elsewhere for the time being and continue to improve yourself. You already have great qualities of being a caring person. I can see you doing well in some type of community volunteer group.

I wish you the very best. Sometimes we have to know when not to push, OK? Believe me there are many bright things in your future.


Send questions to Rosie at: heyrosie2[email protected] or P.O Box 152, Kingstown, St. Vincent & the Grenadines.