Dear Pastor
October 21, 2005
I love him more than his girlfriend

Dear Pastor Jackson,

I read the Searchlight newspaper anytime I know that you are in it.

I met you once before and it was a pleasure. I was in school and you came to talk to us and I found it very inspiring.

A question that I have for you is: You know somebody for a long time and you know that they have been looking at you for quite some time now. And now you know that they may be in love with you and you love them. {{more}}The thing is though he has a girlfriend and she does not treat him right. Both persons find comfort with each other, make each other laugh when they are with each other. The person he is with does not make him happy. Is something wrong in taking charge of the situation to save the person from their pain?

Confused Mind

Greetings, my Dear

Thanks for the compliment. Now hear me, you are NOT a love doctor or a heart healing pill so don’t take charge of nothing (if it is you being referred to). If this guy is so unhappy let him be the one to decide when he has had enough or when his relationship is gone beyond repair.

If he is so unhappy in this relationship (he is not married right?), and he is so in love with this other person then the other person will not have to take charge, he would have already jumped ship, as it were. The thing is though he may very well be enjoying this other person’s company while he holds on to his relationship with the hope of salvaging it because it may mean more to him than his other lady wants to admit.

The truth is some people are in relationships and as they get to know each other they may find themselves unable to continue but those TWO persons must make that decision. I always get scared when someone else is in the midst because it can often backfire. So many times the person who is supposedly offended may have some obvious faults contributing to the mess that needs to be corrected. But when this hopeful outsider is there stroking his or her ego, making them feel they are the poor ill-treated ones, they continue in their error.

So my advice is to you or the person you are speaking about (if it is not you) back off and give the two people a chance to work their stuff out. And if it doesn’t work then…but until then stop being the fifth wheel, even if it is at his request!!

Pastor Jackson