Child mash him to hell and back

It is fair to say dat ah comfortable wid de current placements of Diplomats, Am-bassy-dors, Counsel Generals, High Commissioners, Board Cheer-men/women etc. Ah looked at photos covering de appointment of SVG’s High Commissioner, Brereton Horne. And ah remember his dearmom Bethel Bobb now deceased. Ah proud lady, she always carried ah big smile and de beautiful teeth to go wid it. Thank you sis ter Beths. So ah looked at High Commissioner Britain Horne shaking hands wid King Charles III, and ah said to myself, dey goes another “Lickle Black Boy!” Is d’s things and times dah does mek man eat dey heart out!

De story is dat long before How-he Prince of ULP became SVG’s Consul General to the USA, and Britain Horne of NDP as SVG’s High Commissioner to de United Kingdom, More-rice Horne from Mount Grenan one of SVG’s better play-writer brought de young-stars How-he and his kid brother, Britain down ah town, to go pon stage as key characters in ah local comedy product-shun, “ The Visitor”. Britain played Immigration Officer and How-he was ah news reporter. Talk bout laughs (LOL), part ah de script dat has remained stuck in my head was de scene way ah mother and lickle daughter were in the Immigration Office. All of ah sudden de lickle girl blurted out, and said: “Mammy look ah white man mash me!” And de mother’s immediate response was: “Child, go mash him to hell back!”

Mek dis story short. Britain migrated to de UK to study Law, copy de Queen’s English wid it’s smooth accent. Later de news broke dat Barrister-at-Law Britain Horne had returned to SVG to contest de South Windward seat as an NDP Candidate. He didn’t get de victory he wanted. He returned to meet Queen Betty, where every Sat-dey morning, he reported home: “On the Outside,” to SVG via Nice Radio.

On March 17, 2026, ah followed de programme when His Excellency J.M. Brereton Horne presented his credentials to His Majesty King Charles III marking the final phase of his commencement as the High Commissioner for Saint Vincent and the Grenadines to the United Kingdom. Lie-Za said she was dey and being an expert on lip reading, she picked up de jist of de very private conversation between King Charles and High Commissioner Britain. Now de King visited SVG twice. In 1973 he was an Officer in the Royal Navy aboard the frigate HMS Minerva. He played Cricket with de ship’s team vs ah local team. He made ah short appearance fielding on de boundary near the pavilion, didn’t bowl or bat. De King knows “ah thing ah two” bout SVG and de North Windward side.Madam lip reading expert Lie-Za repeated word foh word to Britain: King Charles III: “ Yuh have a powerful name Britain, yuh doh mind if I call yuh Britty? I am Charles, call me Charlo or Chuck.

Yuh are from Mon-Grenon, not far from your former PM. He told me he went to school barefooted, no shoes, pretty painful in’it? Did you go to school barefooted as well?”

High Commissioner Britain: “ No Your Majesty sorry, Charlo, I never went to school barefooted. My Mom brought shoes from Trinidad for all her twelve children. She was a Trafficker, so also was de former PM’s dad. He was a shop-keeper and owned a passenger bus, therefore ‘your Friend and my friend’ would have had more shoes’n’socks dan any other child in de village.

He stretches de Truth beyond de limits, tells a lot of lies, too many!Sorry to be so lethal your Majesty.”

King Charles III: “ That’s alright Britty, you are just ‘mashing him to hell back!” And wid dat is gone ah gone again.

One Love Bassy

• Bassy Alexander is a land surveyor, folklorist and social commentator.