Bassy - Love Vine
January 6, 2006
My pick foh Personality of De Year

Oh the Christmas was lovely. No matter how things bad all year round, when yuh see Christmas coming up; everybody does go down pon dey knees and beg God foh help. And is like every year we does get Jesus to soften up his heart and beg off foh us. Ah could just see Him telling His Ole Man: “Dad, We know all those prayers and promises they making is just foh Us to give them ah good season; after all is said and done, it’s My birthday, forgive them, let them have what they want for the party”; and is so the food and the drinks and the gifts does flow. {{more}}When New Years come and everything done, we gone back to square one. Some ah we don’t even tek time out to say thanks, not until next November.

Ah must mention that the Nativity Pagent put on by the Baptist Church at Garden’s Gate made this Christmas special foh me. Lots ah work went into this open-air production, the high point was how they made every thing possible, Real and Live. Mary (no Real pregnancy there) with her spouse Joseph riding ah Real and Live ass from Nazareth to Bethlehem, the Manger scene was something else, Real Live animals pen-up, there was one healthy looking lickle ram sheep there; Pastor Frederick hinted that we walk with him foh de ole year night cook, but that lickle fellah manish and he smart; he know is the season foh mutton, and like he was hearing us too, he kept his distance, yuh could see he done tell he-self nobody cutting out his bawls foh Christmas.

Then there was time foh delivery of the Baby Jesus, some Real Live midwife action, supervised I believe by Doc Slater, not Dug-he, his wife Sherry-Ann, the Gynaecologist now ah born again Christian who overs labour pains, Dug-he only knows who in Labour. Ah guess that’s what “Nature” did to him. Then we had to look Heaven-wards, high up on ah scaffold erected foh this scene were some lickle seven and eight year old angels, actually they looked like Angels, well, innocent kids dressed like Real Live Angels praising and worshipping the new born Christ.

Another high point was the scene at Herod’s Palace, appropriate Roman costumes and high drama. Finally there was the time of reflection, ah reminder that whereas there was no room at the Inn foh Mary to deliver her Baby Jesus, there is still lots ah room at the foot of the Cross foh who so ever will. We took the kids and they asked ah lot ah questions after, ah think they got ah better graphic understanding of the birth of Jesus, ah fantastic production, lots ah creativity and lots ah wuk!


All my life ah been hearing that when yuh have ah fresh cold or chest cold yuh need to suck plenty orange or grapefruit not to mention ah good cup ah hot Bush tea, and what ah list ah Bush to chose from: over 300 varieties ah mint, sage, catnip, nettle, rosemary or is it rose-merry, sarsaparilla, ginger and lots more but none by the name ah George; as ah matter ah fact since George bush is president ah the USA ah stop drink bush, ah fraid ah might get ah dose ah George to drink by mistake. Can yuh imagine me taking daily doses ah our local Bush and then add ah cup bush from the US pon that? But on ah more serious note.

There’s this article ah read that suggests when ever yuh notice ah child or adult always suffering from colds, one after the other, yuh try every cough mixture, every aunty-buy-ah-tick, yuh suck-off ah whole orange or grapefruit tree and the cold or cough stick up dey, sounding like ah bass drum when yuh cough; the writer say try ah ripe Banana before meals and one before bedtime. Yuh hear what ah say?

Try ah Banana! And is good logic. The writer says that foods eaten are later converted into two groups Acids and Alkaline. The body must have both and there must be ah balance. If ever yuh find every likle sickness pass by catching yuh or yuh catching it, is too much Acids in the body. And who are the Acid culprits: fats, beef and pork, tomatoes, oranges, limes etc. Now the writer did not say don’t eat these foods, because they have high nutritious values, but they produce Acids that must be balanced off with Alkaline foods. Of course Alkaline foods are vegetables green and yellow, legumes and so on.

But interestingly the fruit that seems to have lickle or no Acids, put it the other way the food that is highest in Alkaline content is our Banana is it! Why yuh think yuh no longer hear the slogan “An apple ah day keeps the doctor away” that’s because it is not true, never was, ah Banana ah day is what will keep not only the Doctor away but lots ah diseases. So maybe we ought to treat our Banana with more respect and dignity and give it its rightful place in the fruit bowl, ah would think its rightful place is in yuh belly!


After all the pull-it-tek-all-lies-in, squander-lies-in and scan-dah-lies-in, there is now ah lull in the fight. Deep down however ah scents the anger and hatred and bitterness coming from both sides.

Ah would think by now ah would ah hear and see both sides Genuinely appealing to the nation foh restoration of peace. The winners would ah come out and Genuinely thank those who supported as Well as those who did not support them; and Genuinely promise ah fair deal foh all. Similarly the losers should come out and Genuinely do likewise; and then Genuinely congratulate each other.

Lie-Za did colour mixing and she say that when yuh mix Red and Yellow yuh get orange.

Well right now my Genuine Prayer is that the good Lord will mek them all Colour Blind, confuse dey vision like how He did confuse dey language building the tower of Babe-hell, so that when they look at dey supporters Red or Yellow, dey see one Colour, that’s Orange.


And my pick foh the person who would have done the best job representing the nation in ah manner that brought Honour, Pride, Respect, Dignity and Inspiration to the youths of this nation is Kioka Cruickshank, she’s my pick foh Personality ah the Year. And with that, ah gone again. One Love Bassy.